Would You Hire this Woman to Cater Your Wedding?
This is the third article in my series: BankerGirl Plans a Wedding - a honest account of my wedding decisions and related expenses as they occur. New readers can click here to start the series from the beginning.
Today I had hoped to publish a post celebrating the fact that we finally confirmed a wedding caterer.
This is not that post.
Last week, I made arrangements for Matt and me to meet with a prospective food vendor for our October wedding. I was super-stoked to see her menu recommendations - I had heard that she was a big proponent of using only locally produced, organic foods. Her credentials were impeccable - she even catered a 1000-guest fundraising dinner for Bill & Hillary Clinton. I had heard nothing but wonderful things about her abilities as a chef, but after our interaction last week - I’m not so sure I can hire her.
When I first visited with her over the phone, I was completely on board with her vision for our menu. Some of her ideas included pork prepared three ways, no fewer than half a dozen salad and vegetable dishes showcasing seasonal produce, and two styles of potatoes - all for $20 per plate. She even promised to throw in free use of her china and flatware (to encourage use of real dishes instead of land-filling paper waste).
It all seemed too good to be true, and that should have been a red flag.
I emailed her a few days prior to our scheduled appointment, reminding her of the directions to the wedding/reception site and telling her that I was looking forward to seeing what she had put together for a menu. I even talked to her on the phone the day of our meeting and verified the time and my expectations.
My expectations were not met.
She arrived at the location forty-five minutes late. And she didn’t come alone. She brought her dogs.
Who does that? I love my dog - but I would never bring her to a business meeting.
Further, she couldn’t control either of her animals. One - a big, burly black lab - literally pulled her over. She was grasping his leash when he bolted across the lawn and she belly-flopped right into the grass. I have never seen anything like it. Matt had to chase down the dog while I helped her to her feet. We were not off to a great start.
We put the dogs in a fenced-in park area near the ceremony site - where they proceeded to do their doggie business under her watchful eye. She made some comment about having plastic bags in the car to pick up after them, but left without doing so. Instead, she walked away while they barked and carried on as she joined me on a tour of the grounds. Matt ended up baby-sitting the animals while I asked for her copy of the proposed menu. Her response: “I have the whole thing planned out. It’s locked away in my head.”
At this point I was really starting to become agitated. I had specifically asked her on two different occasions prior this moment that she bring a written quote with her so that I could share it with my parents (they are the ones paying for this blessed event, after all). Maybe it’s my project management experience showing through - but I’m not ok paying someone $2400 for a meal that they have only planned out in their head - even if it’s not my money.
At this point I was ready to call it a day - and Matt looked like he might deck her. But every time we tried to tie up the conversation she would launch into another story about an event she catered for someone marginally famous - it was painful.
Finally, she got the hint, gathered her dogs, and drove away - leaving the steaming piles of dog doo in her wake. Matt and I had to go to a nearby convenience store to get plastic bags to remove the offending deposits.
I can’t believe that this is the woman that received such raves from our smart, foodie friends. The price is right, and we share a lot of the same values when it comes to food, but I don’t think I can work with such a flake.
Given all of the warning signs, I don’t think we can hire her in good conscious.
What would you do?
Stumble it!
May 5th, 2008 at 10:37 pm
Some people think this kind of absentmindedness is charming or a sign of genius.
I think more like you, this woman would just be another cause of stress and concern on a day that is already has more than enough of it.
May 6th, 2008 at 8:32 am
I say this naively, but certainly there are other people out there who are willing to do this event. I’m sure you have other options if you look for them. I would say don’t settle for somebody you aren’t comfortable or sure about.
May 6th, 2008 at 8:57 am
Go with your gut. I’d run far, far away from this crazy lady
May 6th, 2008 at 1:15 pm
I would not use her, but part of me also thinks you should write her a polite, but constructive letter telling her why you’re not using her.
Sure, she might write you off as a bitch, but perhaps she doesn’t realize that her behavior and lack of planning are losing her potential customers.
May 6th, 2008 at 3:40 pm
Do not jump on that hand grenade. Your first mistake was in getting a referral from your foodie friends.
Foodies are flaky. Sorry. They just are! [My apologies to all my foodies in the hood - but secretly, you know it is true.]
You want a business referral on the catering, not a foodie referral. A good business may not “share your philosophy” but will be able to more efficiently deliver what you want.
Sad but true.
May 6th, 2008 at 3:44 pm
I’ll throw in one real life example:
My cousin got married and wanted as much locally grown organic food at the reception as possible. Their “granola guy” caterer flaked out so they had to go with a long-standing “traditional” caterer. Guess what? The caterer had been long standing because of its professional conduct and ability to satisfy the customer.
You aren’t looking for a kindred spirit. You are looking for a professional service.
May 7th, 2008 at 6:58 am
I totally agree. This woman’s unprofessionalism and immature behavior would be a real turnoff to me, and not exactly capable of inspiring confidence.
I agree that it would be constructive to write her a brief letter letting her know why she didn’t get your business.
May 8th, 2008 at 3:58 pm
I would follow your instinct and not hire her. At the very least, as someone mentioned, it sounds like she would be a source of stress up to the very end.
A professional caterer should be able to take your concerns and try to accommodate them, working with your budget of course.